Changing
shyness, one person
at a time...
"Amazing
secrets finally revealed — how to overcome shyness for good, make
friends, attract the opposite sex, and finally get on with your life!"
Dear Friend,
Shyness sucks, doesn't it?
You have trouble getting dates. You don't get invited to parties. Dances are for other people.
You're
really a good person. You're sensitive, considerate. You follow all the
rules of "How To Win Friends and Influence People." Yet you still have
trouble making friends or attracting the opposite sex. All around you,
you see
people quickly making friends, enjoying lively conversations, having a
good time, and getting as many dates as they desire. You think to
yourself "What
is wrong with me? Why can other people make friends so easily but I
can't? Am I just an unlikable person?"
No, you're not
an unlikable person. You're
just shy.
Believe
me, I know. For many
years, I was just about the shyest person you ever met. Call me a
"recovering shy guy."
In all those
years as a shy person, I
became intensely
aware of just what is wrong with being shy. I had trouble making
friends, never went on dates, and generally just sat by myself in the
cafeteria at lunch time, pretending I wasn't lonely.
You see, I
know how frustrating it is to go
through
life being unable to draw other people into warm personal contacts!
The greatest
need of human beings aside
from food,
clothing and shelter is that of human companionship. Shyness strikes at the very core of what it
means to
be human—the ability to make that vital human connection
with
others!
The sad thing about shyness is when shy
people behave
shyly, they hate themselves later for doing so—for having failed to
make that connection when they had the chance.
The fact
is that shyness or social phobia,
depending on their degree, can keep you from making friends, finding a
mate, even getting or holding onto a job. How outgoing you
are,
in large part, determines whether you become a janitor or a manager, a
delivery driver or the head of the company. No matter how skilled you
are in your particular field of expertise, if you lack skill in dealing
with other people, you will have a tough time achieving success.
The big city,
a new school or the
dog-eat-dog world of
work can seem like awfully inhospitable places without the comfort and
warm companionship of good friends. Some people are able to make
friends in their first day of entering a new environment. Others aren't able to form close
friendships
even
after several years!
While the
popular conception of shy people
may be that
they are aloof or distant, unlike true introverts, shy people are
actually far from indifferent to the desire to be well-liked. In fact,
shy people may be even more concerned about being liked than
extroverts, since, for shy people, the goal of popularity may be harder
to attain and thus more tantalizing.
And this is
why shyness can be so
maddening. On the one
hand, it makes it difficult to become well-liked, but on the other
hand, it creates a feverish desire to be liked, since we all tend to
desire most those things that are withheld from us!
Extreme
shyness can even mean
that you feel unhappy or uncomfortable whenever you find yourself
around other people. This is, of course, a large
percentage of
the time for the student, the employee or anyone else for that matter. And if other
people should sense your aversion to them, this can lead to even more
strained relations!
As if all this
weren't bad enough, shy
people are even
said to be more prone to hypertension, (according to a Stanford
University study reported in Longevity
magazine), because they constantly worry about how they're being
perceived. And according to a report published in the journal Science, people
who live isolated lives with few strong friendships are twice as likely
to die prematurely as those who have close friends and a
strong
social network. Researchers in the United States, Finland and Sweden
found that the mortality risk from social isolation is as great as the
mortality risk from smoking. The findings came from studies of more
than 37,000 people.
Shyness
can hurt your chances of
getting a good job, too. Research done at the University
of
Tulsa in Oklahoma showed that the more shy a person is, the less
prestigious his last job title tends to be. Unfortunately, almost every
lucrative position requires a strong personality, assertiveness and an
astute sense of office politics. It also requires you to be liked by
other people; your boss, your clients and your co-workers. The sad fact
is that shy people are often not liked by as many people as they like,
and are sometimes liked by very few!
Even
worse, I've found that shy
people can be the subject of cruel harassment on the job by people who
think that their timid and unassertive demeanor makes them a convenient
"punching bag!"
And
then there's trying to
attract the opposite sex!
If you're a guy, how
many times
have you heard from a girl "I only like you as a friend." If so, you
know how much that can sting. Sure, you want to have friends, but you
would also like to someday form a relationship that goes, well, a
little deeper. But you just don't know how to emotionally connect with
a woman.
If you're
female and reading this, you have
a similar
problem. Guys think of you as the "quiet" or "bookish" type and you get
passed by or overlooked when it comes to invitations for the prom, the
dance, and other activities. Or maybe you're full grown adult, out in
the real-world, and you're either still single or you have had a
history of unsatisfying relationships.
The fact
is that shyness affects
almost every aspect of your life. Humans are social
creatures,
and we desperately need to connect and get on well with others in order
to enjoy any kind of success, whether it be social or professional.
Believe me, I know. Like I said, I was shy
myself, and
I know what it's like eating by yourself in the cafeteria every day,
desperately wanting to strike up a conversation with that pretty girl
but not knowing how, being overlooked for advancement on the job simply
because you're shy and quiet, and all the other problems that go along
with being a shy person.
But then
I discovered the secret
of overcoming shyness. No, this secret didn't come in a
flash of
blinding inspiration or insight. It took many years of study,
investigation and painful trial and error before I finally discovered
the TRUE secrets of overcoming shyness. I pored through scores of
books. I tried different disciplines like self hypnosis, meditation,
and even anti-anxiety drugs. It took a long time, but I finally
discovered what really works and what doesn't.
In
fact, you may already know about me. My name is Tim Arends and I am the author of
the
long-running Internet shyness FAQ, (formerly the alt.support.shyness FAQ) which I
first posted to the Internet over 10 years ago (back in 1998, to be precise) and have kept updated
ever since. (An FAQ is a list of Frequently Asked Questions and their
answers.) It was originally posted on a monthly basis to the Usenet
newsgroup alt.support.shyness. Soon after that, it was posted to the
Web for all the world to see.
In October of 2008, the free Web server the
site was
hosted on decided to drop their service. So I decided to create a new
domain for it at www.shyFAQ.com.
So, you see, I'm no "Johnny-Come-Lately" to this world of shyness counseling. I know what it's like to be
shy, and I
want to help other people overcome their shyness. Indeed, countless
numbers of shy people have found my FAQ over the years and benefited from it. I was
pleased that the FAQ was mentioned in the famous "Dear Abby" newspaper
column, circulated in hundreds of newspapers around the world. I have
gotten wonderful comments over the years in response to my FAQ,
comments like the following:
Excellent site. You
folks have put
together an excellent amount and range of information. Well done. —
Mark
This website has given me
inspiration and
hope to try and become less shy. I have always struggled
with my
shyness but never had the self-confidence to change-but after reading
this website I am especially motivated to change, especially after
reading the techniques on visualization and systematic desensitization.
Life is short, and I want to be able to enjoy it by not having to worry
so much about what other people think of me due to this shyness-and I
hope these techniques help me to do so. — Nadia
This website has helped me alot.
More people should have a positive input about shy individuals.
Continue to provide more information like this. It helps people to
realize that their is nothing wrong with being shy we just need a
little encourgement in our lives! May God bless — Lyrica, Tennessee
I find there
are so many
facets of shyness covered in here. I could identify mine as well. This wealth of information is a
great
starting point for me to deal with the issues I face
& hope
to improve. — Roland, Singapore
I wanted to
thank you for
this exelent web site about shyness . I have read some books about this
subject and articles (not much) and the advise you give her are the
best I have seen so far. I
felt like
you could read my mind somtimes, coz i recognized so well
the
things you mentioned. I wish that all shy people, can get as good
imformation as you give on this web page, coz they gave me a lot of
stength and help, and so it would be an advance to other people as
well. — Sara, Iceland
This site is really something
else - I am
delighted to have found it. Shyness has plagued my life,
all of
the symptoms are there - not being able to strike up small
conversations (resulting in having so little friends), an almost
alarming lack of self esteem, really I was at my wits end as to what I
could possibly do to cope. Feeling awkward is my speciality - but with
all of the great tips on this site, I feel a greater confidence that I
will (someday) be able to overcome my crippling shyness (never totally
but realistically deal with it) As we all know, that is what we all
must do to lead happier lives... — Jane, U.K.
And many more...
But even though my FAQ helped so many people, I realized that I could
do so much more. I realized that a website was not enough; I needed to
create a complete system on how to overcome shyness, make friends,
become popular, get a great job, and win with the opposite sex.
That's why I created...
Break
out of Your Shell! How To Overcome Shyness So You Can Get On With Your
Life!
It's a complete home-study system that
describes in
careful, step-by-step detail, exactly how to overcome shyness in the
easiest and quickest way possible. In fact, I think I can honestly say
that this is the only system of its kind. It is packed with
hard-hitting, no-nonsense strategies and written with the understanding
that only someone who's "been there" himself can have.
Make no
mistake: this is not just another
book on
shyness. This is a complete and comprehensive home study system on how
to overcome shyness once and for all, and in the most painless way
possible!
Let's face it:
shy people get a lot
of well-intentioned advice from parents, psychologists, counselors and
so on. But most people simply don't understand shyness like someone who
has been through it — they couldn't possibly understand how it feels
or how much it hurts.
So you
hear well-intentioned but over simplistic advice like
"Just show
an interest in other people. That's all you have to do to make them
love you," or "If you're friendly you will make more friends," or "You
need to think about helping other people rather than just yourself."
Maybe they say that you just suffer from "low self-esteem" and if you
simply learn to like yourself, your shyness will vanish!
Now here's the kicker: Some people, even
some
psychologists, blame shy people themselves for being shy! They say that
shyness is a form of egocentricism or selfishness! If shy people would
simply stop thinking about themselves and would instead think about
others, their shyness would disappear!
This
is a classic case of
blaming the victim!
Other so-called "self-help" regimens throw
out a bunch
of mystical mumbo-jumbo and then say that if it doesn't work, it must
be your fault because you simply "didn't believe in it strongly enough!"
Enough of that
nonsense! Shy people
have been kicked around long enough! Now it's time to fight back! It's
time for some real, hard-hitting, proven, no-nonsense strategies for
breaking out of your shell and becoming the type of person you always
dreamed of!
And that's exactly what I have created!
In
my powerful,
hard-hitting, and complete SYSTEM just look at what you will learn:
- How shyness
appears to other people and what they
really think about shy people
- Why other people respond to shy people
the way they
do
- The powerful principle of "attitude
matching" and
how to take advantage of it
- The difference between shyness and
introversion
- The psychology of being popular
- How your subconscious mannerisms can
drive people
away from you, and how to identify these mannerisms and change
them—permanently!
- A complete test of self-analysis to help
you
understand every aspect of your shyness and exactly how to beat it
- How to overcome anxiety without drugs!
- What works and what doesn't in
overcoming
shyness
- The simple 3 x 5 card file system for
conquering
shyness
- The amazing power of visualization; how
to use the
"theater of your mind" to transform your life
- The different kinds of visualization,
and how to
make your visualizations vivid and powerful
- How to create a shyness journal that
will help you
understand every aspect of your shyness and how to overcome it
- How to mirror extroverted people and
establish
rapport
- Verbal self-defense; how to keep people
from walking
all over you and making you look like a fool
And
that's just
the beginning! You'll also learn:
- How to
easily make conversation with everyone you
meet
- The powerful "Thought Drift" and
"Branching"
techniques of conversation
- How to create a great first impression
- How to share interesting facts about
yourself
- How and when to strike up a conversation
- How to never have trouble thinking of
things to
say—EVER!
- How to deepen the conversation and move
beyond
superficialities like "Nice weather were having, isn't it?"
- Balancing the two-way exchange
- How to seem like an expert on any
subject
- How to avoid those "awkward silences"
- How to deal with people who seem to be
unfriendly—and those who really are!
- Group conversation: 12 challenges and
how to deal
with them (no other source I know of covers this essential aspect of
human relations so thoroughly)
How
to easily
make friends
- How to get
to know your neighbors
- How to get invited to parties and
actually enjoy
them
- How to turn mere acquaintances into
lasting
friendships
- How to get along with your friends
- How to deal with common friendship
problems such as
friends who are ultra competitive, friends who betray confidences,
friends who dominate conversations, friends who have split
personalities and so on
- How to gracefully end an unsatisfying
friendship
How
to handle
jerks (this is my favorite part!)
- How to be
assertive and stick up for your own rights
- How to handle cliques and snobs (and end
up having
the last laugh!)
- How to deal with manipulative people
- How to deal with constant critics and
those who use
"helpful" criticism as a secret tool of psychological warfare
- How shy people are more likely to be
used as pawns
in mind games and what to do about it
- How to become a master of the brilliant
comeback
- How to deal withe specific difficult
types, such as
constant interrupters, people who go on and on and on and on, snobs,
bossy people, know-it-alls, argumentative types and insulting jerks!
How
to choose
the perfect career
- How to
overcome the type of shyness that keeps you
from landing the job of your dreams
- How to avoid job-hunting scams
- How to be a master of the job fair and
the job
interview
- How to create a great first impression
when starting
at a new workplace
- The scary truth about on-the-job
politics, and how
shy people are more likely to be the victims of it
- How "hazing" is often used in the
workplace as a
tool of harassment and intimidation
- Why shy people are often the victims of
on-the-job
harassment
- How to differentiate fair criticism on
the job from
that which is used as a cruel means of manipulation
- How to handle troublemakers on the job
- How to get on well with your co-workers
- How to impress your boss
- What to do if the boss is also the
business owner
How
to win the boyfriend or girlfriend of your dreams
- How to
attract the opposite sex
- Great places to meet the opposite sex
- How to never have trouble
thinking of
things to say
- How to easily get all the dates you can
handle!
- The unspoken male and female roles in dating (this may surprise you)
- Master secrets you must know if you want
to use
personal ads or dating sites
- How to turn a "friend" into a romantic
partner (never again hear "I just want to be friends")
- How to increase your allure so that you become a magnet to the opposite sex!
- And much, much more!!!
How does all
that sound to you? By
now, your head is probably swimming, but you can see that I have
covered all aspects of shyness in great detail. I'm particularly
proud of the extensive parts of the course that deal with how to win the guy or gal of your dreams.
The
most common problem of shyness is having trouble succeeding with the
opposite sex. If someone has any shyness at all, it is most likely to
come out, or at least be most severe, whenever entering the realms of
dating, flirting, or even approaching a good-looking guy or gal.
I
hear shy people complain all the time that they have no trouble making
friends of the same sex, and yet when it comes to flirting or making
contact with someone that might have some kind of romantic
implications, they become as tongue-tied as a five-year-old
trying to say "antidisestablishmentarianism!"
So
if attracting the opposite sex is the number one concern of so many shy
people, why didn't I just write a course on so-called "seduction"
techniques?
Because I find that learning how to overcome "dating
anxiety" requires a synergistic or holistic approach. If you are shy around the
opposite sex, it means that you have some unresolved issues that need
to be worked out first.
I
find that no one is "only" severely shy around the opposite sex. There
are deeper issues. And most of the techniques in my system that pertain
to shyness in other areas of ones life also pertain to romantic
issues. That is, if you can resolve the hidden issues from the
rest of your life, you'll find that approaching the opposite sex will
take care of itself, and vice versa.
After all, why would you have no
trouble making friends, yet be unable to attract romantic
partners, if there weren't some serious mental blocks holding you back?
Here's
another problem with those so-called "seduction" courses: They give you
"tips" and "techniques" for approaching the opposite sex, but they
don't address the underlying causes and problems of shyness!
Let's say you're given a great "opening line" for approaching someone. Yet, when you actually try to use it, you're scared to death, you seem nervous, you fail to make good eye contact or you lack confidence! What good does it do you?
None, nada, zip!
That's why my system addresses the secret,
unconscious mannerisms that may be giving you away! The barely
noticeable, subtle yet unmistakable clues that communicate to someone
that you're unconfident, timid...
And deep down, you don't think you're
good enough for them!
And then my system tells you how to eliminate
these traits and replace them with an unshakable, radiant confidence and self-assurance!
Okay, it sounds good, but what about other shyness “experts” or “gurus” out there?
Well, I should
warn you, there are a lot of phony “experts” that you should watch out
for. Here's how to evaluate them and see if they really have what it
takes:
1.
Have they
been down that long hard road of shyness themselves and overcome it?
2.
Do they throw
out empty platitudes like "Believe in yourself" or "You could do it if
you really wanted to?"
3.
Do they talk
as if shyness is entirely the shy person's fault, or do they point out
the ways in which nasty, manipulative, and controlling people sometimes
try to take advantage of shy people's vulnerability? In other words, do
they "pull no punches" and tell it like it really is?
4.
Do they cover
all aspects of overcoming shyness such as dealing with difficult people
and winning with the opposite sex?
5.
Are they
"Johnny-come-latelys" or do they have a long history of helping people
with the problem of shyness?
6.
Do they push
expensive medications?
7.
Do they
charge exorbitant fees with no guarantee of success?
By now, you have seen how my system covers
how to
overcome virtually every aspect of shyness and explains how to become a
master of every situation. Now I want to impress upon you the need to
take action.
You see, I
subscribed to the mistaken
notion for a long
time that I was going to eventually "outgrow my shyness." So I waited
and waited, and failed to take action. Sometimes,
people do outgrow their shyness—to a degree. But it
doesn't
always happen. It makes more sense to err on the side of
caution and
make sure you're taking the steps you need to now in order to beat your
shyness, doesn't it?
So
how much would you pay to
finally overcome your shyness?
Well, let's think about it.
People have spent $250 per session for psychotherapy! Certainly, not
all psychotherapy or counseling is that expensive, but whatever it
costs, it can certainly add up! It's not unusual to spend hundreds of
dollars a year on therapy, and still not find a satisfying resolution
to your problem.
Medication
can also be
dreadfully expensive. Anti-anxiety medications can run
into
thousands of dollars a year! Plus, anti-anxiety medications only treat
the anxiety. They don't even touch on any of the other aspects of
shyness we have talked about, such as lack of self-confidence, not
knowing what to say, not feeling comfortable, not making good eye
contact, etc.. Anti anxiety medications, just as the name implies,
address only the anxiety aspect of shyness! Plus, they can cause
bothersome side effects, such as a bad taste in your mouth, loss of sex
drive, etc. You can be assured that my system costs a lot less than
anti-anxiety medications with none of the unwanted side effects!
Now
think of how much your
shyness can cost you in lost income throughout your lifetime.
Think of the long series of poorly-paying jobs because you don't know
how to "network" or impress in a job interview, the lack of promotions
because you fail to get on well with your boss or supervisors, the
hanging onto a poorly-paying job because you dread going through the
job-hunting process all over again—how much will all that cost you
over your lifetime in lost wages?
Now, how much
would you pay for such a
powerful system
as I am offering here? $300? $500? Believe me, I would practically have
given my right arm to have learned such powerful methods of overcoming
shyness when I was growing up.
When I say that what I offer is a complete
system, I mean it! It's
not
just a "course" or a "manual." It is a complete system that addresses
all of the issues surrounding shyness—lack of self-confidence,
anxiety, lack of conversational skills, lack of assertiveness, poor
"networking" skills, trouble attracting the opposite sex, and all the
other issues that go along with shyness.
And
that's not
all!
Act
Immediately
and Receive the Following 5 Free Bonuses...
Since
I know it's 100% to your benefit to
act right
away, I want to sweeten the pot and give you every possible reason to
say YES today! If you respond immediately, you'll also receive the
following:
Bonus
#1:
Hypnotic Relaxation Audio
If
you act now, you will get two powerful audio downloads that use
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relaxation and autosuggestion that works hand-in-hand with the Break Out of Your Shell System!
In
the increased state of suggestibility, you will more readily accept
suggestions for overcoming your shyness and you will learn how to be
completely relaxed in any situation. Both audios are specifically designed
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conjunction with the powerful techniques taught in this system, so that
you will be able to "see," hear and feel the changes that you are
making in yourself right away!
Audio #1 carefully guides you through the
entire technique
of self hypnosis, gives you time to make powerful suggestions to
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These
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A
$59.95 Value
Bonus #2: What
do I Say Now? - Conversation-Sparking Questions for Every Situation
You
have heard the advice that you should talk about the other person, and
not just yourself. "Ask questions that the other person will enjoy
answering," they say. But how do you do this? It actually turns out to
be a lot harder than it sounds. How do you know what the other person
will enjoy talking about? That is the reason for this bonus book—it
contains powerful conversation-sparking topics for practically every
situation you're ever likely to run into.
These
are not "dumb," generic questions like, "If you were stranded on a
desert island, what two or three books would you most like to have with
you?" These are lists of highly relevant, situation-specific questions
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occasions. You simply arm yourself in advance of any event you
know you're going to be in by memorizing a few of these powerful
conversational topics, and you will be able to confidently enter into a
sparkling conversation with anybody, at any time! You will find
extensive lists of topics and
questions for situations like the following:
- Questions for fellow students
- Great topics for making
conversation with teachers and instructors
- Conversation-sparking questions
for neighbors
- Great topics for parties
- Questions for job fairs and
interviews
- Questions for clubs and people
who share your interests
- Great conversation topics for
co-workers when starting a new job
- Ways to create a rapport with
the boss and supervisors
- Topics to keep the conversation
going effortlessly during a date
With
this book, you'll remove your difficulty in thinking of things to say
or keeping the conversation going and you'll make a good impression on
the other person by showing interest in him or her. People will love
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A $19.95
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Bonus
#3: 75
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Knowing
how to talk to people is fine. But
how do you
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places to meet people whether they be of the same or the opposite sex.
You can also use this guide to find great, low-stress places to
meet the opposite sex for the romance of your dreams.
You will be meeting people and making friends of both sexes in no time
with this
handy guide.
A
$19.95 Value
Bonus
#4: How to Remember People's
Names; The Master Key to Success and
Popularity, Expanded
Edition
You
may have already read my ebook on
how to make
a great first impression on people by remembering their names, but in
case you haven't, a copy is included with this system. However, this is
the expanded
edition that teaches you not only how to remember people's
names but how to remember important facts about them so that you never
need be embarrassed by forgetting key facts about people again! What's
more, this bonus will be included as a free instant download to you when you order the
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A
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And
here's the most amazing bonus of all:
Bonus
#5: Two
full years of free e-mail consultations
If
you act right now, you will get two full
years of
email consultations on overcoming your shyness. You'll be able to write
to me, the creator of this anti-shyness system, with any questions or
concerns that you may have for two full years!
Everybody
warned me I shouldn't offer this
kind of
bonus. They said I would be overwhelmed with e-mail requests for
advice. But you see, I really want to help people overcome their
shyness! I want to make sure you succeed with this system even though
this bonus has the potential to keep me very, very busy! However, I
think the course is so comprehensive that you will not need to consult
with me very often. So I have decided to offer this fantastic bonus.
Keep
in mind that this is not a pen pal
service; it is
an opportunity for you to get clarification on any points on overcoming
shyness that you may not be clear about. But you must order now to
qualify for this fantastic bonus!
A
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Testimonials
Testimonials
are starting to pour in. Here are just a few from my ever-growing
files--unedited and exactly as received. These are not comments on my
website; they are actual testimonials regarding the complete Break Out of Your Shell System offered on this page.
Don't take my word for it--see what others say about this fantastic system!
I enjoyed your Internet shyness FAQ, so I was excited to find the whole overcoming shyness system that you offer. It is every bit as good as I expected,
and even better, because you go into so much more detail on every
aspect of overcoming shyness. Thanks for releasing this! — M.L., Denmark
I thought the section on relationships would be
the only part I would be interested in, but I found valuable tips
throughout your entire method! I especially liked the part on job
hunting and getting on with your co-workers when starting a new job! I'm 100% satisfied with my purchase in every way! — Mike, Phoenix, AZ
Wow!
I was totally blown away by the amount of information you include here!
This is far better than any book I have read on shyness. I used to feel
tongue-tied when trying to talk to people, but now, armed with your
methods and conversational topics for any situation, I now feel more confident when meeting new people. — Joseph, Chicago IL
Your section on dealing with difficult people meant so much to me.
For so long I have been asked "why are you so quiet," as if sometimes
being quiet is an unforgivable sin. I have been looked down on b/c
people think I was snobbish just because I sometimes have trouble
making conversation. Your course showed me that I am not alone, and
that there are definite steps I can take to create a good impression
and to deal with people who try to put me down b/c of my shyness. —
Erik, Nova Scotia
Thank
you, thank you thank you for your wonderful course! I am so happy to
find someone that doesn't spit out the same old cliches and give the
same old advice. "You don't like yourself! Learn to like yourself
and your shyness will go away." That's what some of the so-called
"experts" say. But I DO like myself! I just had trouble getting OTHER
people to like me! I say HAD, because finally I have found a
method (yours) that actually works, and doesn't insult me and put me
down and doesn't say that my shyness was "my own fault!" I
feel much more confident after learning your system. Already I have
found a great guy and I met him at one of the places recommended in
your book! — Candice, Evansville IN
Your
bonuses are great! I love the one on places to meet people, I never
thought of most of those before, and your hypnotic sessions definitely made
me feel more relaxed. I already am making new friends and Im well on my way to overcoming shyness. Your system is worth many more times than the asking price! — Mike, Seattle WA
Yours
is not just a course on overcoming shyness — it is a course on making
friends, achieving confidence, overcoming anxiety, becoming a good
conversationalist, standing up for yourself, getting a good job,
advancing in the workplace, and attracting the opposite sex! I am
bowed over by the amount of information that you give! Your right when
you say this is a complete system, I have learned so much from your
course. I think I can safely say I am moving from the ranks of shy to
downright outgoing! Plus, I have gotten a better job recently and I attribute it to the techniques I learned from your course. Thank you so much! — Janis, Charleston, SC
Your
material on attracting the opposite sex has much more useful
information than the so-called "seduction" course I bought! That was
about how to be full of fake...yours is about how to be genuine! I am now dating a great girl and I have you to thank for it! — Conor, San Francisco, CA
Finally
I have found someone who really understands me and my shyness! You
don't "pooh-pooh" the seriousness of shyness, but at the same time you
are very encouraging and you give great tips for overcoming it! I find it much easier to meet people after reading your course. — Yousef, Australia
I am a girl and found a great guy after applying your techniques! Thank you so much. — Catherine, Bucks U.K.
You can see that you get a terrific value
with my system. Yeah, sure,
you could maybe hunt down all this information yourself in books or
online...but it would take years! Think of all the information you
would have to sort through—both good and bad. Think of the years of
painful trial and error in attempting to find out what works and what
doesn't. I've done all that difficult and painful work for you...so why
would you want to do it yourself? Besides, I'm sure you want to
overcome your shyness now—not
years from now. You've waited long
enough to start enjoying life...why should you wait any longer?
All right, all this sounds GREAT, but how much does it cost?
My
financial adviser strongly urged me to price the printed, bound, physical version of my system at least at
$150.00. He said that there is so much valuable information in this
system that I could easily charge twice that amount. But I wanted to
make this system available to as many people as possible. So I decided
to price it at only $127.00!
But
wait! For a limited time only I am offering it for even less—at the low
introductory price of only $97.00!
But you must act NOW, because I
don’t know how long I will be able to keep it at this discounted price!
News flash!
Now you save even more, because for a (very) short time only, I am offering a special low introductory
price of only $35.00
for the downloadable electronic version of my system! That's right, you
get this complete system for a fraction of the original price, and you get it instantly!
You
see, for some time I've sold this system as a physical, printed
textbook and supplementary materials that I mailed out to customers.
But many people were so eager to get their hands on this life-changing
information immediately that they just couldn't wait for it to be
physically delivered to them.
Also, by offering the system as
a digital download, I can save myself the reproduction costs of having
it physically duplicated, saving purchasers even more money! Plus, there are no postage costs for a digital delivery. That means you save even more money!
PLUS...ordering my system now is a
no-brainer,
because...
You
Can't Lose
With My 100%, Ironclad, Money-back Guarantee:
Here's My
Personal Guarantee to You:
I
want to help
you overcome shyness. Read and re-read the course, use the strategies,
learn how to achieve a deep relaxation any time with my hypnotic
audios,
benefit from all the supplementary materials for 365 days, then, if
you want a full refund, you'll get your money back, No need to explain
anything. I won't ask you a single question. No hard feelings. It's
simple: Either you love my Program or you get a full refund. If my
system doesn't help you overcome your shyness, I don't want your money!
What's more, I want you to keep all of the free bonuses as a gift for
your troubles!
By ordering NOW you save almost $100.00 off the original
price of the printed edition!
You pay not $127.00, not $97.00 but only $35.00
for the complete electronic version of the system! The system comes in
easy-to-read PDF files that are readable on both Macs and PCs, and
audio files that can be played on any computer or MP3 player. You will
get:
- The complete Break out of Your Shell! System!
- Two Hypnotic Relaxation Audios
- What do I Say Now? - Conversation-Sparking Questions for Every Situation
- 75 Great Places to Meet People and Make Friends
- How to Remember People's Names; The Master Key to Success and Popularity, Expanded Edition
- Two full years of free e-mail consultations!
Ordering
is easy. You may pay by credit card or through PayPal. Simply click
below to go to my Secure Order Form.
Don't miss out! Click this order button now!
(Certified secure
server 1ShoppingCart.com.
100% guaranteed safe shopping.)
You can see that I give
you all the tools you need to overcome your shyness once and for all! I
take all the risk, and you assume none.
What
is it worth to you never
to have to be shy again? Think of all the
increased
income you
will gain from being able to get a good job and get the advancements
and promotions you deserve—all because you are able to network
effectively, speak up for yourself, impress the boss, and ask for that
raise? Think of how much it will be worth to you to increase your
popularity and make friends easily. How about meeting the man or woman
of your dreams? To melt that icy cellophane that people seem to come
wrapped in and truly make that real, human connection with others. And
not least in importance, getting people to recognize your true worth as
a human being—to not have it hidden from others just because of your
shyness.
Believe me, I've been through the same
thing you have
and I know what shyness is like.
Why spend
another day of your life being shy? Order
this fantastic
system
NOW and take the first step toward your new life!
Click the button above and the complete
system on overcoming shyness and all of the free bonuses will be rushed
to you, and you will gain immediate access to the download of How to Remember People's Names;
The Master
Key to Success and Popularity, Expanded Edition, so you
can
begin overcoming your shyness now!
P.S. Click here
only if you decide not to order this
fantastic system
P.P.S. Remember
that you have
absolutely nothing to lose—except your shyness! If you order now, you
will get the complete system on overcoming your shyness, the two
hypnotic audios, 75 Great Places to Meet People and Make Friends, What do
I Say Now? - Conversation-Sparking Questions for Every Situation, the
expanded edition of How To Remember People's Names; The Master Key To
Success and Popularity, and two full years of free e-mail
consultations! Plus you get my 365-day, ironclad 100%, no questions asked,
money-back guarantee! But you are assured all this only if you order
NOW!
P.P.P.S.
Remember that by ordering this money-saving digital
download version of my system, You benefit in two ways: you get
the system instantly and you pay much less than you would for the
printed version! Know that this is the complete system, exactly
word-for-word as you would get it if you ordered the hard copy, but at
a dramatic savings! But keep in mind also that this offer is
available for a limited time only, so hurry!
Contact
me: timarends@aol.com
�2009
Tim Arends Enterprises * 105 Beacon Dr.
*
Hobart, IN 46342 * U.S.A. *
Earth * Phone: (219) 947-3782
|
Changing shyness, one person at a time... "Amazing secrets finally revealed — how to overcome shyness for good, make friends, attract the opposite sex, and finally get on with your life!" Dear Friend, Shyness sucks, doesn't it? You have trouble getting dates. You don't get invited to parties. Dances are for other people. You're really a good person. You're sensitive, considerate. You follow all the rules of "How To Win Friends and Influence People." Yet you still have trouble making friends or attracting the opposite sex. All around you, you see people quickly making friends, enjoying lively conversations, having a good time, and getting as many dates as they desire. You think to yourself "What is wrong with me? Why can other people make friends so easily but I can't? Am I just an unlikable person?" No, you're not an unlikable person. You're just shy. Believe me, I know. For many years, I was just about the shyest person you ever met. Call me a "recovering shy guy." In all those years as a shy person, I became intensely aware of just what is wrong with being shy. I had trouble making friends, never went on dates, and generally just sat by myself in the cafeteria at lunch time, pretending I wasn't lonely. You see, I know how frustrating it is to go through life being unable to draw other people into warm personal contacts! The greatest need of human beings aside from food, clothing and shelter is that of human companionship. Shyness strikes at the very core of what it means to be human—the ability to make that vital human connection with others! The sad thing about shyness is when shy people behave shyly, they hate themselves later for doing so—for having failed to make that connection when they had the chance. The fact is that shyness or social phobia, depending on their degree, can keep you from making friends, finding a mate, even getting or holding onto a job. How outgoing you are, in large part, determines whether you become a janitor or a manager, a delivery driver or the head of the company. No matter how skilled you are in your particular field of expertise, if you lack skill in dealing with other people, you will have a tough time achieving success. The big city, a new school or the dog-eat-dog world of work can seem like awfully inhospitable places without the comfort and warm companionship of good friends. Some people are able to make friends in their first day of entering a new environment. Others aren't able to form close friendships even after several years! While the popular conception of shy people may be that they are aloof or distant, unlike true introverts, shy people are actually far from indifferent to the desire to be well-liked. In fact, shy people may be even more concerned about being liked than extroverts, since, for shy people, the goal of popularity may be harder to attain and thus more tantalizing. And this is why shyness can be so maddening. On the one hand, it makes it difficult to become well-liked, but on the other hand, it creates a feverish desire to be liked, since we all tend to desire most those things that are withheld from us! Extreme shyness can even mean that you feel unhappy or uncomfortable whenever you find yourself around other people. This is, of course, a large percentage of the time for the student, the employee or anyone else for that matter. And if other people should sense your aversion to them, this can lead to even more strained relations! As if all this weren't bad enough, shy people are even said to be more prone to hypertension, (according to a Stanford University study reported in Longevity magazine), because they constantly worry about how they're being perceived. And according to a report published in the journal Science, people who live isolated lives with few strong friendships are twice as likely to die prematurely as those who have close friends and a strong social network. Researchers in the United States, Finland and Sweden found that the mortality risk from social isolation is as great as the mortality risk from smoking. The findings came from studies of more than 37,000 people. Shyness can hurt your chances of getting a good job, too. Research done at the University of Tulsa in Oklahoma showed that the more shy a person is, the less prestigious his last job title tends to be. Unfortunately, almost every lucrative position requires a strong personality, assertiveness and an astute sense of office politics. It also requires you to be liked by other people; your boss, your clients and your co-workers. The sad fact is that shy people are often not liked by as many people as they like, and are sometimes liked by very few! Even worse, I've found that shy people can be the subject of cruel harassment on the job by people who think that their timid and unassertive demeanor makes them a convenient "punching bag!" And then there's trying to attract the opposite sex! If you're a guy, how many times have you heard from a girl "I only like you as a friend." If so, you know how much that can sting. Sure, you want to have friends, but you would also like to someday form a relationship that goes, well, a little deeper. But you just don't know how to emotionally connect with a woman. If you're female and reading this, you have a similar problem. Guys think of you as the "quiet" or "bookish" type and you get passed by or overlooked when it comes to invitations for the prom, the dance, and other activities. Or maybe you're full grown adult, out in the real-world, and you're either still single or you have had a history of unsatisfying relationships. The fact is that shyness affects almost every aspect of your life. Humans are social creatures, and we desperately need to connect and get on well with others in order to enjoy any kind of success, whether it be social or professional. Believe me, I know. Like I said, I was shy myself, and I know what it's like eating by yourself in the cafeteria every day, desperately wanting to strike up a conversation with that pretty girl but not knowing how, being overlooked for advancement on the job simply because you're shy and quiet, and all the other problems that go along with being a shy person. But then I discovered the secret of overcoming shyness. No, this secret didn't come in a flash of blinding inspiration or insight. It took many years of study, investigation and painful trial and error before I finally discovered the TRUE secrets of overcoming shyness. I pored through scores of books. I tried different disciplines like self hypnosis, meditation, and even anti-anxiety drugs. It took a long time, but I finally discovered what really works and what doesn't.
In October of 2008, the free Web server the site was hosted on decided to drop their service. So I decided to create a new domain for it at www.shyFAQ.com. So, you see, I'm no "Johnny-Come-Lately" to this world of shyness counseling. I know what it's like to be shy, and I want to help other people overcome their shyness. Indeed, countless numbers of shy people have found my FAQ over the years and benefited from it. I was pleased that the FAQ was mentioned in the famous "Dear Abby" newspaper column, circulated in hundreds of newspapers around the world. I have gotten wonderful comments over the years in response to my FAQ, comments like the following: Excellent site. You
folks have put
together an excellent amount and range of information. Well done. —
Mark This website has given me inspiration and hope to try and become less shy. I have always struggled with my shyness but never had the self-confidence to change-but after reading this website I am especially motivated to change, especially after reading the techniques on visualization and systematic desensitization. Life is short, and I want to be able to enjoy it by not having to worry so much about what other people think of me due to this shyness-and I hope these techniques help me to do so. — Nadia This website has helped me alot.
More people should have a positive input about shy individuals.
Continue to provide more information like this. It helps people to
realize that their is nothing wrong with being shy we just need a
little encourgement in our lives! May God bless — Lyrica, Tennessee I wanted to thank you for this exelent web site about shyness . I have read some books about this subject and articles (not much) and the advise you give her are the best I have seen so far. I felt like you could read my mind somtimes, coz i recognized so well the things you mentioned. I wish that all shy people, can get as good imformation as you give on this web page, coz they gave me a lot of stength and help, and so it would be an advance to other people as well. — Sara, Iceland This site is really something else - I am delighted to have found it. Shyness has plagued my life, all of the symptoms are there - not being able to strike up small conversations (resulting in having so little friends), an almost alarming lack of self esteem, really I was at my wits end as to what I could possibly do to cope. Feeling awkward is my speciality - but with all of the great tips on this site, I feel a greater confidence that I will (someday) be able to overcome my crippling shyness (never totally but realistically deal with it) As we all know, that is what we all must do to lead happier lives... — Jane, U.K.
That's why I created...
It's a complete home-study system that describes in careful, step-by-step detail, exactly how to overcome shyness in the easiest and quickest way possible. In fact, I think I can honestly say that this is the only system of its kind. It is packed with hard-hitting, no-nonsense strategies and written with the understanding that only someone who's "been there" himself can have. Make no mistake: this is not just another book on shyness. This is a complete and comprehensive home study system on how to overcome shyness once and for all, and in the most painless way possible! Let's face it: shy people get a lot of well-intentioned advice from parents, psychologists, counselors and so on. But most people simply don't understand shyness like someone who has been through it — they couldn't possibly understand how it feels or how much it hurts. So you hear well-intentioned but over simplistic advice like "Just show an interest in other people. That's all you have to do to make them love you," or "If you're friendly you will make more friends," or "You need to think about helping other people rather than just yourself." Maybe they say that you just suffer from "low self-esteem" and if you simply learn to like yourself, your shyness will vanish! Now here's the kicker: Some people, even some psychologists, blame shy people themselves for being shy! They say that shyness is a form of egocentricism or selfishness! If shy people would simply stop thinking about themselves and would instead think about others, their shyness would disappear! This is a classic case of blaming the victim! Other so-called "self-help" regimens throw out a bunch of mystical mumbo-jumbo and then say that if it doesn't work, it must be your fault because you simply "didn't believe in it strongly enough!" Enough of that nonsense! Shy people have been kicked around long enough! Now it's time to fight back! It's time for some real, hard-hitting, proven, no-nonsense strategies for breaking out of your shell and becoming the type of person you always dreamed of! And that's exactly what I have created! In my powerful, hard-hitting, and complete SYSTEM just look at what you will learn:
And that's just the beginning! You'll also learn:
How to easily make friends
How to handle jerks (this is my favorite part!)
How to choose the perfect career
How to win the boyfriend or girlfriend of your dreams
How does all that sound to you? By now, your head is probably swimming, but you can see that I have covered all aspects of shyness in great detail. I'm particularly proud of the extensive parts of the course that deal with how to win the guy or gal of your dreams. The most common problem of shyness is having trouble succeeding with the opposite sex. If someone has any shyness at all, it is most likely to come out, or at least be most severe, whenever entering the realms of dating, flirting, or even approaching a good-looking guy or gal. I hear shy people complain all the time that they have no trouble making friends of the same sex, and yet when it comes to flirting or making contact with someone that might have some kind of romantic implications, they become as tongue-tied as a five-year-old trying to say "antidisestablishmentarianism!" So if attracting the opposite sex is the number one concern of so many shy people, why didn't I just write a course on so-called "seduction" techniques? Because I find that learning how to overcome "dating anxiety" requires a synergistic or holistic approach. If you are shy around the opposite sex, it means that you have some unresolved issues that need to be worked out first. I find that no one is "only" severely shy around the opposite sex. There are deeper issues. And most of the techniques in my system that pertain to shyness in other areas of ones life also pertain to romantic issues. That is, if you can resolve the hidden issues from the rest of your life, you'll find that approaching the opposite sex will take care of itself, and vice versa. After all, why would you have no trouble making friends, yet be unable to attract romantic partners, if there weren't some serious mental blocks holding you back? Here's another problem with those so-called "seduction" courses: They give you "tips" and "techniques" for approaching the opposite sex, but they don't address the underlying causes and problems of shyness! Let's say you're given a great "opening line" for approaching someone. Yet, when you actually try to use it, you're scared to death, you seem nervous, you fail to make good eye contact or you lack confidence! What good does it do you? None, nada, zip! That's why my system addresses the secret, unconscious mannerisms that may be giving you away! The barely noticeable, subtle yet unmistakable clues that communicate to someone that you're unconfident, timid... And deep down, you don't think you're good enough for them! And then my system tells you how to eliminate these traits and replace them with an unshakable, radiant confidence and self-assurance! Okay, it sounds good, but what about other shyness “experts” or “gurus” out there? Well, I should warn you, there are a lot of phony “experts” that you should watch out for. Here's how to evaluate them and see if they really have what it takes: 1. Have they been down that long hard road of shyness themselves and overcome it? 2. Do they throw out empty platitudes like "Believe in yourself" or "You could do it if you really wanted to?" 3. Do they talk as if shyness is entirely the shy person's fault, or do they point out the ways in which nasty, manipulative, and controlling people sometimes try to take advantage of shy people's vulnerability? In other words, do they "pull no punches" and tell it like it really is? 4. Do they cover all aspects of overcoming shyness such as dealing with difficult people and winning with the opposite sex? 5. Are they "Johnny-come-latelys" or do they have a long history of helping people with the problem of shyness? 6. Do they push expensive medications? 7. Do they charge exorbitant fees with no guarantee of success? By now, you have seen how my system covers how to overcome virtually every aspect of shyness and explains how to become a master of every situation. Now I want to impress upon you the need to take action. You see, I subscribed to the mistaken notion for a long time that I was going to eventually "outgrow my shyness." So I waited and waited, and failed to take action. Sometimes, people do outgrow their shyness—to a degree. But it doesn't always happen. It makes more sense to err on the side of caution and make sure you're taking the steps you need to now in order to beat your shyness, doesn't it? So how much would you pay to finally overcome your shyness? Well, let's think about it. People have spent $250 per session for psychotherapy! Certainly, not all psychotherapy or counseling is that expensive, but whatever it costs, it can certainly add up! It's not unusual to spend hundreds of dollars a year on therapy, and still not find a satisfying resolution to your problem. Medication can also be dreadfully expensive. Anti-anxiety medications can run into thousands of dollars a year! Plus, anti-anxiety medications only treat the anxiety. They don't even touch on any of the other aspects of shyness we have talked about, such as lack of self-confidence, not knowing what to say, not feeling comfortable, not making good eye contact, etc.. Anti anxiety medications, just as the name implies, address only the anxiety aspect of shyness! Plus, they can cause bothersome side effects, such as a bad taste in your mouth, loss of sex drive, etc. You can be assured that my system costs a lot less than anti-anxiety medications with none of the unwanted side effects! Now think of how much your shyness can cost you in lost income throughout your lifetime. Think of the long series of poorly-paying jobs because you don't know how to "network" or impress in a job interview, the lack of promotions because you fail to get on well with your boss or supervisors, the hanging onto a poorly-paying job because you dread going through the job-hunting process all over again—how much will all that cost you over your lifetime in lost wages? Now, how much would you pay for such a powerful system as I am offering here? $300? $500? Believe me, I would practically have given my right arm to have learned such powerful methods of overcoming shyness when I was growing up. When I say that what I offer is a complete system, I mean it! It's not just a "course" or a "manual." It is a complete system that addresses all of the issues surrounding shyness—lack of self-confidence, anxiety, lack of conversational skills, lack of assertiveness, poor "networking" skills, trouble attracting the opposite sex, and all the other issues that go along with shyness. And that's not all!
TestimonialsTestimonials are starting to pour in. Here are just a few from my ever-growing files--unedited and exactly as received. These are not comments on my website; they are actual testimonials regarding the complete Break Out of Your Shell System offered on this page. Don't take my word for it--see what others say about this fantastic system! I enjoyed your Internet shyness FAQ, so I was excited to find the whole overcoming shyness system that you offer. It is every bit as good as I expected, and even better, because you go into so much more detail on every aspect of overcoming shyness. Thanks for releasing this! — M.L., Denmark I thought the section on relationships would be the only part I would be interested in, but I found valuable tips throughout your entire method! I especially liked the part on job hunting and getting on with your co-workers when starting a new job! I'm 100% satisfied with my purchase in every way! — Mike, Phoenix, AZ Wow!
I was totally blown away by the amount of information you include here!
This is far better than any book I have read on shyness. I used to feel
tongue-tied when trying to talk to people, but now, armed with your
methods and conversational topics for any situation, I now feel more confident when meeting new people. — Joseph, Chicago IL Your section on dealing with difficult people meant so much to me. For so long I have been asked "why are you so quiet," as if sometimes being quiet is an unforgivable sin. I have been looked down on b/c people think I was snobbish just because I sometimes have trouble making conversation. Your course showed me that I am not alone, and that there are definite steps I can take to create a good impression and to deal with people who try to put me down b/c of my shyness. — Erik, Nova Scotia Thank you, thank you thank you for your wonderful course! I am so happy to find someone that doesn't spit out the same old cliches and give the same old advice. "You don't like yourself! Learn to like yourself and your shyness will go away." That's what some of the so-called "experts" say. But I DO like myself! I just had trouble getting OTHER people to like me! I say HAD, because finally I have found a method (yours) that actually works, and doesn't insult me and put me down and doesn't say that my shyness was "my own fault!" I feel much more confident after learning your system. Already I have found a great guy and I met him at one of the places recommended in your book! — Candice, Evansville IN Your bonuses are great! I love the one on places to meet people, I never thought of most of those before, and your hypnotic sessions definitely made me feel more relaxed. I already am making new friends and Im well on my way to overcoming shyness. Your system is worth many more times than the asking price! — Mike, Seattle WA Yours is not just a course on overcoming shyness — it is a course on making friends, achieving confidence, overcoming anxiety, becoming a good conversationalist, standing up for yourself, getting a good job, advancing in the workplace, and attracting the opposite sex! I am bowed over by the amount of information that you give! Your right when you say this is a complete system, I have learned so much from your course. I think I can safely say I am moving from the ranks of shy to downright outgoing! Plus, I have gotten a better job recently and I attribute it to the techniques I learned from your course. Thank you so much! — Janis, Charleston, SC Your
material on attracting the opposite sex has much more useful
information than the so-called "seduction" course I bought! That was
about how to be full of fake...yours is about how to be genuine! I am now dating a great girl and I have you to thank for it! — Conor, San Francisco, CA Finally
I have found someone who really understands me and my shyness! You
don't "pooh-pooh" the seriousness of shyness, but at the same time you
are very encouraging and you give great tips for overcoming it! I find it much easier to meet people after reading your course. — Yousef, Australia I am a girl and found a great guy after applying your techniques! Thank you so much. — Catherine, Bucks U.K.
All right, all this sounds GREAT, but how much does it cost? My
financial adviser strongly urged me to price the printed, bound, physical version of my system at least at
$150.00. He said that there is so much valuable information in this
system that I could easily charge twice that amount. But I wanted to
make this system available to as many people as possible. So I decided
to price it at only $127.00! News flash! Now you save even more, because for a (very) short time only, I am offering a special low introductory price of only $35.00 for the downloadable electronic version of my system! That's right, you get this complete system for a fraction of the original price, and you get it instantly! You
see, for some time I've sold this system as a physical, printed
textbook and supplementary materials that I mailed out to customers.
But many people were so eager to get their hands on this life-changing
information immediately that they just couldn't wait for it to be
physically delivered to them. PLUS...ordering my system now is a
no-brainer,
because...
You Can't Lose With My 100%, Ironclad, Money-back Guarantee:
Believe me, I've been through the same thing you have and I know what shyness is like. Why spend another day of your life being shy? Order this fantastic system NOW and take the first step toward your new life! Click the button above and the complete system on overcoming shyness and all of the free bonuses will be rushed to you, and you will gain immediate access to the download of How to Remember People's Names; The Master Key to Success and Popularity, Expanded Edition, so you can begin overcoming your shyness now!
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