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Changing shyness, one person at a time... ![]() "Amazing secrets finally revealed — how to overcome shyness for good, make friends, attract the opposite sex, and finally get on with your life!" Dear Friend, Shyness sucks, doesn't it? You have trouble getting dates. You don't get invited to parties. Dances are for other people. You're really a good person. You're sensitive, considerate. You follow all the rules of "How To Win Friends and Influence People." Yet you still have trouble making friends or attracting the opposite sex. All around you, you see people quickly making friends, enjoying lively conversations, having a good time, and getting as many dates as they desire. You think to yourself "What is wrong with me? Why can other people make friends so easily but I can't? Am I just an unlikable person?" No, you're not an unlikable person. You're just shy. Believe me, I know. For many years, I was just about the shyest person you ever met. Call me a "recovering shy guy." In all those years as a shy person, I became intensely aware of just what is wrong with being shy. I had trouble making friends, never went on dates, and generally just sat by myself in the cafeteria at lunch time, pretending I wasn't lonely. You see, I know how frustrating it is to go through life being unable to draw other people into warm personal contacts! The greatest need of human beings aside from food, clothing and shelter is that of human companionship. Shyness strikes at the very core of what it means to be human—the ability to make that vital human connection with others! The sad thing about shyness is when shy people behave shyly, they hate themselves later for doing so—for having failed to make that connection when they had the chance. The fact is that shyness or social phobia, depending on their degree, can keep you from making friends, finding a mate, even getting or holding onto a job. How outgoing you are, in large part, determines whether you become a janitor or a manager, a delivery driver or the head of the company. No matter how skilled you are in your particular field of expertise, if you lack skill in dealing with other people, you will have a tough time achieving success. The big city, a new school or the dog-eat-dog world of work can seem like awfully inhospitable places without the comfort and warm companionship of good friends. Some people are able to make friends in their first day of entering a new environment. Others aren't able to form close friendships even after several years! While the popular conception of shy people may be that they are aloof or distant, unlike true introverts, shy people are actually far from indifferent to the desire to be well-liked. In fact, shy people may be even more concerned about being liked than extroverts, since, for shy people, the goal of popularity may be harder to attain and thus more tantalizing. And this is why shyness can be so maddening. On the one hand, it makes it difficult to become well-liked, but on the other hand, it creates a feverish desire to be liked, since we all tend to desire most those things that are withheld from us! Extreme shyness can even mean that you feel unhappy or uncomfortable whenever you find yourself around other people. This is, of course, a large percentage of the time for the student, the employee or anyone else for that matter. And if other people should sense your aversion to them, this can lead to even more strained relations! As if all this weren't bad enough, shy people are even said to be more prone to hypertension, (according to a Stanford University study reported in Longevity magazine), because they constantly worry about how they're being perceived. And according to a report published in the journal Science, people who live isolated lives with few strong friendships are twice as likely to die prematurely as those who have close friends and a strong social network. Researchers in the United States, Finland and Sweden found that the mortality risk from social isolation is as great as the mortality risk from smoking. The findings came from studies of more than 37,000 people. Shyness can hurt your chances of getting a good job, too. Research done at the University of Tulsa in Oklahoma showed that the more shy a person is, the less prestigious his last job title tends to be. Unfortunately, almost every lucrative position requires a strong personality, assertiveness and an astute sense of office politics. It also requires you to be liked by other people; your boss, your clients and your co-workers. The sad fact is that shy people are often not liked by as many people as they like, and are sometimes liked by very few! Even worse, I've found that shy people can be the subject of cruel harassment on the job by people who think that their timid and unassertive demeanor makes them a convenient "punching bag!" And then there's trying to attract the opposite sex! If you're a guy, how many times have you heard from a girl "I only like you as a friend." If so, you know how much that can sting. Sure, you want to have friends, but you would also like to someday form a relationship that goes, well, a little deeper. But you just don't know how to emotionally connect with a woman. If you're female and reading this, you have a similar problem. Guys think of you as the "quiet" or "bookish" type and you get passed by or overlooked when it comes to invitations for the prom, the dance, and other activities. Or maybe you're full grown adult, out in the real-world, and you're either still single or you have had a history of unsatisfying relationships. The fact is that shyness affects almost every aspect of your life. Humans are social creatures, and we desperately need to connect and get on well with others in order to enjoy any kind of success, whether it be social or professional. Believe me, I know. Like I said, I was shy myself, and I know what it's like eating by yourself in the cafeteria every day, desperately wanting to strike up a conversation with that pretty girl but not knowing how, being overlooked for advancement on the job simply because you're shy and quiet, and all the other problems that go along with being a shy person. But then I discovered the secret of overcoming shyness. No, this secret didn't come in a flash of blinding inspiration or insight. It took many years of study, investigation and painful trial and error before I finally discovered the TRUE secrets of overcoming shyness. I pored through scores of books. I tried different disciplines like self hypnosis, meditation, and even anti-anxiety drugs. It took a long time, but I finally discovered what really works and what doesn't.
In October of 2008, the free Web server the site was hosted on decided to drop their service. So I decided to create a new domain for it at www.shyFAQ.com. So, you see, I'm no "Johnny-Come-Lately" to this world of shyness counseling. I know what it's like to be shy, and I want to help other people overcome their shyness. Indeed, countless numbers of shy people have found my FAQ over the years and benefited from it. I was pleased that the FAQ was mentioned in the famous "Dear Abby" newspaper column, circulated in hundreds of newspapers around the world. I have gotten wonderful comments over the years in response to my FAQ, comments like the following: Excellent site. You
folks have put
together an excellent amount and range of information. Well done. —
Mark This website has given me inspiration and hope to try and become less shy. I have always struggled with my shyness but never had the self-confidence to change-but after reading this website I am especially motivated to change, especially after reading the techniques on visualization and systematic desensitization. Life is short, and I want to be able to enjoy it by not having to worry so much about what other people think of me due to this shyness-and I hope these techniques help me to do so. — Nadia This website has helped me alot.
More people should have a positive input about shy individuals.
Continue to provide more information like this. It helps people to
realize that their is nothing wrong with being shy we just need a
little encourgement in our lives! May God bless — Lyrica, Tennessee I wanted to thank you for this exelent web site about shyness . I have read some books about this subject and articles (not much) and the advise you give her are the best I have seen so far. I felt like you could read my mind somtimes, coz i recognized so well the things you mentioned. I wish that all shy people, can get as good imformation as you give on this web page, coz they gave me a lot of stength and help, and so it would be an advance to other people as well. — Sara, Iceland This site is really something else - I am delighted to have found it. Shyness has plagued my life, all of the symptoms are there - not being able to strike up small conversations (resulting in having so little friends), an almost alarming lack of self esteem, really I was at my wits end as to what I could possibly do to cope. Feeling awkward is my speciality - but with all of the great tips on this site, I feel a greater confidence that I will (someday) be able to overcome my crippling shyness (never totally but realistically deal with it) As we all know, that is what we all must do to lead happier lives... — Jane, U.K.
That's why I created...
It's a complete home-study system that describes in careful, step-by-step detail, exactly how to overcome shyness in the easiest and quickest way possible. In fact, I think I can honestly say that this is the only system of its kind. It is packed with hard-hitting, no-nonsense strategies and written with the understanding that only someone who's "been there" himself can have. Make no mistake: this is not just another book on shyness. This is a complete and comprehensive home study system on how to overcome shyness once and for all, and in the most painless way possible! Let's face it: shy people get a lot of well-intentioned advice from parents, psychologists, counselors and so on. But most people simply don't understand shyness like someone who has been through it — they couldn't possibly understand how it feels or how much it hurts. So you hear well-intentioned but over simplistic advice like "Just show an interest in other people. That's all you have to do to make them love you," or "If you're friendly you will make more friends," or "You need to think about helping other people rather than just yourself." Maybe they say that you just suffer from "low self-esteem" and if you simply learn to like yourself, your shyness will vanish! Now here's the kicker: Some people, even some psychologists, blame shy people themselves for being shy! They say that shyness is a form of egocentricism or selfishness! If shy people would simply stop thinking about themselves and would instead think about others, their shyness would disappear! This is a classic case of blaming the victim! Other so-called "self-help" regimens throw out a bunch of mystical mumbo-jumbo and then say that if it doesn't work, it must be your fault because you simply "didn't believe in it strongly enough!" Enough of that nonsense! Shy people have been kicked around long enough! Now it's time to fight back! It's time for some real, hard-hitting, proven, no-nonsense strategies for breaking out of your shell and becoming the type of person you always dreamed of! And that's exactly what I have created! In my powerful, hard-hitting, and complete SYSTEM just look at what you will learn:
And that's just the beginning! You'll also learn:
How to easily make friends
How to handle jerks (this is my favorite part!)
How to choose the perfect career
How to win the boyfriend or girlfriend of your dreams
How does all that sound to you? By now, your head is probably swimming, but you can see that I have covered all aspects of shyness in great detail. I'm particularly proud of the extensive parts of the course that deal with how to win the guy or gal of your dreams. The most common problem of shyness is having trouble succeeding with the opposite sex. If someone has any shyness at all, it is most likely to come out, or at least be most severe, whenever entering the realms of dating, flirting, or even approaching a good-looking guy or gal. I hear shy people complain all the time that they have no trouble making friends of the same sex, and yet when it comes to flirting or making contact with someone that might have some kind of romantic implications, they become as tongue-tied as a five-year-old trying to say "antidisestablishmentarianism!" So if attracting the opposite sex is the number one concern of so many shy people, why didn't I just write a course on so-called "seduction" techniques? Because I find that learning how to overcome "dating anxiety" requires a synergistic or holistic approach. If you are shy around the opposite sex, it means that you have some unresolved issues that need to be worked out first. I find that no one is "only" severely shy around the opposite sex. There are deeper issues. And most of the techniques in my system that pertain to shyness in other areas of ones life also pertain to romantic issues. That is, if you can resolve the hidden issues from the rest of your life, you'll find that approaching the opposite sex will take care of itself, and vice versa. After all, why would you have no trouble making friends, yet be unable to attract romantic partners, if there weren't some serious mental blocks holding you back? Here's another problem with those so-called "seduction" courses: They give you "tips" and "techniques" for approaching the opposite sex, but they don't address the underlying causes and problems of shyness! Let's say you're given a great "opening line" for approaching someone. Yet, when you actually try to use it, you're scared to death, you seem nervous, you fail to make good eye contact or you lack confidence! What good does it do you? None, nada, zip! That's why my system addresses the secret, unconscious mannerisms that may be giving you away! The barely noticeable, subtle yet unmistakable clues that communicate to someone that you're unconfident, timid... And deep down, you don't think you're good enough for them! And then my system tells you how to eliminate these traits and replace them with an unshakable, radiant confidence and self-assurance! Okay, it sounds good, but what about other shyness “experts” or “gurus” out there? Well, I should warn you, there are a lot of phony “experts” that you should watch out for. Here's how to evaluate them and see if they really have what it takes: 1. Have they been down that long hard road of shyness themselves and overcome it? 2. Do they throw out empty platitudes like "Believe in yourself" or "You could do it if you really wanted to?" 3. Do they talk as if shyness is entirely the shy person's fault, or do they point out the ways in which nasty, manipulative, and controlling people sometimes try to take advantage of shy people's vulnerability? In other words, do they "pull no punches" and tell it like it really is? 4. Do they cover all aspects of overcoming shyness such as dealing with difficult people and winning with the opposite sex? 5. Are they "Johnny-come-latelys" or do they have a long history of helping people with the problem of shyness? 6. Do they push expensive medications? 7. Do they charge exorbitant fees with no guarantee of success? By now, you have seen how my system covers how to overcome virtually every aspect of shyness and explains how to become a master of every situation. Now I want to impress upon you the need to take action. You see, I subscribed to the mistaken notion for a long time that I was going to eventually "outgrow my shyness." So I waited and waited, and failed to take action. Sometimes, people do outgrow their shyness—to a degree. But it doesn't always happen. It makes more sense to err on the side of caution and make sure you're taking the steps you need to now in order to beat your shyness, doesn't it? So how much would you pay to finally overcome your shyness? Well, let's think about it. People have spent $250 per session for psychotherapy! Certainly, not all psychotherapy or counseling is that expensive, but whatever it costs, it can certainly add up! It's not unusual to spend hundreds of dollars a year on therapy, and still not find a satisfying resolution to your problem. Medication can also be dreadfully expensive. Anti-anxiety medications can run into thousands of dollars a year! Plus, anti-anxiety medications only treat the anxiety. They don't even touch on any of the other aspects of shyness we have talked about, such as lack of self-confidence, not knowing what to say, not feeling comfortable, not making good eye contact, etc.. Anti anxiety medications, just as the name implies, address only the anxiety aspect of shyness! Plus, they can cause bothersome side effects, such as a bad taste in your mouth, loss of sex drive, etc. You can be assured that my system costs a lot less than anti-anxiety medications with none of the unwanted side effects! Now think of how much your shyness can cost you in lost income throughout your lifetime. Think of the long series of poorly-paying jobs because you don't know how to "network" or impress in a job interview, the lack of promotions because you fail to get on well with your boss or supervisors, the hanging onto a poorly-paying job because you dread going through the job-hunting process all over again—how much will all that cost you over your lifetime in lost wages? Now, how much would you pay for such a powerful system as I am offering here? $300? $500? Believe me, I would practically have given my right arm to have learned such powerful methods of overcoming shyness when I was growing up. When I say that what I offer is a complete system, I mean it! It's not just a "course" or a "manual." It is a complete system that addresses all of the issues surrounding shyness—lack of self-confidence, anxiety, lack of conversational skills, lack of assertiveness, poor "networking" skills, trouble attracting the opposite sex, and all the other issues that go along with shyness. And that's not all!
TestimonialsTestimonials are starting to pour in. Here are just a few from my ever-growing files--unedited and exactly as received. These are not comments on my website; they are actual testimonials regarding the complete Break Out of Your Shell System offered on this page. Don't take my word for it--see what others say about this fantastic system! I enjoyed your Internet shyness FAQ, so I was excited to find the whole overcoming shyness system that you offer. It is every bit as good as I expected, and even better, because you go into so much more detail on every aspect of overcoming shyness. Thanks for releasing this! — M.L., Denmark I thought the section on relationships would be the only part I would be interested in, but I found valuable tips throughout your entire method! I especially liked the part on job hunting and getting on with your co-workers when starting a new job! I'm 100% satisfied with my purchase in every way! — Mike, Phoenix, AZ Wow!
I was totally blown away by the amount of information you include here!
This is far better than any book I have read on shyness. I used to feel
tongue-tied when trying to talk to people, but now, armed with your
methods and conversational topics for any situation, I now feel more confident when meeting new people. — Joseph, Chicago IL Your section on dealing with difficult people meant so much to me. For so long I have been asked "why are you so quiet," as if sometimes being quiet is an unforgivable sin. I have been looked down on b/c people think I was snobbish just because I sometimes have trouble making conversation. Your course showed me that I am not alone, and that there are definite steps I can take to create a good impression and to deal with people who try to put me down b/c of my shyness. — Erik, Nova Scotia Thank you, thank you thank you for your wonderful course! I am so happy to find someone that doesn't spit out the same old cliches and give the same old advice. "You don't like yourself! Learn to like yourself and your shyness will go away." That's what some of the so-called "experts" say. But I DO like myself! I just had trouble getting OTHER people to like me! I say HAD, because finally I have found a method (yours) that actually works, and doesn't insult me and put me down and doesn't say that my shyness was "my own fault!" I feel much more confident after learning your system. Already I have found a great guy and I met him at one of the places recommended in your book! — Candice, Evansville IN Your bonuses are great! I love the one on places to meet people, I never thought of most of those before, and your hypnotic sessions definitely made me feel more relaxed. I already am making new friends and Im well on my way to overcoming shyness. Your system is worth many more times than the asking price! — Mike, Seattle WA Yours is not just a course on overcoming shyness — it is a course on making friends, achieving confidence, overcoming anxiety, becoming a good conversationalist, standing up for yourself, getting a good job, advancing in the workplace, and attracting the opposite sex! I am bowed over by the amount of information that you give! Your right when you say this is a complete system, I have learned so much from your course. I think I can safely say I am moving from the ranks of shy to downright outgoing! Plus, I have gotten a better job recently and I attribute it to the techniques I learned from your course. Thank you so much! — Janis, Charleston, SC Your
material on attracting the opposite sex has much more useful
information than the so-called "seduction" course I bought! That was
about how to be full of fake...yours is about how to be genuine! I am now dating a great girl and I have you to thank for it! — Conor, San Francisco, CA Finally
I have found someone who really understands me and my shyness! You
don't "pooh-pooh" the seriousness of shyness, but at the same time you
are very encouraging and you give great tips for overcoming it! I find it much easier to meet people after reading your course. — Yousef, Australia I am a girl and found a great guy after applying your techniques! Thank you so much. — Catherine, Bucks U.K.
All right, all this sounds GREAT, but how much does it cost? My
financial adviser strongly urged me to price the printed, bound, physical version of my system at least at
$150.00. He said that there is so much valuable information in this
system that I could easily charge twice that amount. But I wanted to
make this system available to as many people as possible. So I decided
to price it at only $127.00! News flash! Now you save even more, because for a (very) short time only, I am offering a special low introductory price of only $35.00 for the downloadable electronic version of my system! That's right, you get this complete system for a fraction of the original price, and you get it instantly! You
see, for some time I've sold this system as a physical, printed
textbook and supplementary materials that I mailed out to customers.
But many people were so eager to get their hands on this life-changing
information immediately that they just couldn't wait for it to be
physically delivered to them. PLUS...ordering my system now is a
no-brainer,
because...
You Can't Lose With My 100%, Ironclad, Money-back Guarantee:
Believe me, I've been through the same thing you have and I know what shyness is like. Why spend another day of your life being shy? Order this fantastic system NOW and take the first step toward your new life! Click the button above and the complete system on overcoming shyness and all of the free bonuses will be rushed to you, and you will gain immediate access to the download of How to Remember People's Names; The Master Key to Success and Popularity, Expanded Edition, so you can begin overcoming your shyness now!
P.S. Click here only if you decide not to order this fantastic system P.P.S. Remember that you have absolutely nothing to lose—except your shyness! If you order now, you will get the complete system on overcoming your shyness, the two hypnotic audios, 75 Great Places to Meet People and Make Friends, What do I Say Now? - Conversation-Sparking Questions for Every Situation, the expanded edition of How To Remember People's Names; The Master Key To Success and Popularity, and two full years of free e-mail consultations! Plus you get my 365-day, ironclad 100%, no questions asked, money-back guarantee! But you are assured all this only if you order NOW! P.P.P.S. Remember that by ordering this money-saving digital download version of my system, You benefit in two ways: you get the system instantly and you pay much less than you would for the printed version! Know that this is the complete system, exactly word-for-word as you would get it if you ordered the hard copy, but at a dramatic savings! But keep in mind also that this offer is available for a limited time only, so hurry! Contact
me: timarends@aol.com
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